You can i useactually use and请帮翻译

you can use a spoon 的翻译是:您可以使用勺子 中文翻译英文意思,翻译英语
请在下面的文本框内输入文字,然后点击开始翻译按钮进行翻译,如果您看不到结果,请重新翻译!
you can use a spoon
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相关内容&amake love your first wave 做爱您的第一波浪 & a这个学校有35年历史 This school has 35 years history & aany suspension of the tuition guant or a revocation of this Deed shall not render the Governmentliable for any damages ,loss,expenses,claims,demands or cost of any kind whatsoever,and shall be without prejudice to the right of action of the Government in respect of any prior breeach by the Student of any of the terms a 学费的任何悬浮guant或这种行为的废止不会回报Governmentliable为中的任一种类的任何损伤、损失、费用、要求、要求或者费用任何和是无损于权利政府的行动关于所有预先的breeach由的学生任何期限和条件此中从容 & a和米饭相比,爸爸更喜欢面条 Compares with the rice, the daddy likes the noodles & aIncoterms Incoterms & a今天是星期二 Today is Tuesday & asend shall show sing sit spell spend stand sweep
teach tell throw 送将显示唱歌坐咒语花费立场打扫教告诉投掷 & aPRINTED IN JAPAN 打印在日本 & a亮黑色 Bright black & aconcentrated Brightening Serum 被集中的照亮的清液 & a爱是盲目的 The love is blind & aI think a person can, and I had a lifetime 我认为人罐头和我有终身 & ahere's little something for you 这小的某事为您 & a?? ?? ?? 晚上好兄弟姐妹 & aregistration code 注册代码 & a那还能有什么? What can that also have? & a我要去超市 I must go to the supermarket & a在课堂上记笔记 Records the note in the classroom & a你来自哪里? Where do you come from? & aposterior 以后 & a乐趣 Pleasure & aI'd love to visit Mexico 我会愿意访问墨西哥 & aBeta Key accepted-thank you for participating beta钥匙接受感谢您参与 & aYES.BUT THE
PERSON WHO WILL DIE IS YOU,NOT SOMEONE!YOU KNOW? 人世界卫生组织将死的YES.BUT是您,不是某人! 您知道? & a他学习多努力啊 He studies many diligently & a作品 Work & atoo
early 太及早 & a接人 Meets the human & aasl pz? asl pz ? & a对青岛“草原”事件的看法 To Qingdao “prairie” event view & a我不去那儿除非你跟我走 There I do not go only if you walk with me & aStuff My Ass Full of Cum 充分充塞我的驴子附带 & aMy eternal love 我的永恒爱 & aCome
Jack. 回来的杰克。 & aThought you do not dare to tell you actually 认为您不要敢实际上告诉您 & aRie de janeiro 1月Rie & aI'ma afraid
a I'ma害怕我有a & a假如你是一个仙人掌,我也愿意忍受所有的痛来抱着你 If you are a cactus, I am also willing to endure all pains to hug you & a遇到彼此,是我们的宿命,珍惜 Meets each other, is our fate, treasures & aMelt spinning and dry spinning are two methods of spinning fibres from plastics. 熔体纺丝和干式纺丝是转动纤维二个方法从塑料。 & aSometimes it's hard to know what is right or wrong, who is really think too much 有时知道是坚硬的什么是不错或错误,是太多真正地认为 & a看起来很明亮 Looks like very brightly & alatest date of shipmeng shipmeng最新的日期 & aSealing ring 密封圈 & aIt is difficult
a diary in English 它是困难的一本日志用英语 & a黄丹丹 Huang Dan Dan & a冷静下来 Gets down calmly & aIt is difficult make a diary in English 它是困难的做一本日志用英语 & ayou can use a spoon 您能使用匙子 &英语高手进,帮忙翻译一下,谢谢 第2题_百度知道
英语高手进,帮忙翻译一下,谢谢 第2题
语高手进,这是第2题,我已经试过了,谢谢 一共2题,机器翻译的就先谢过了,不过还是希望大家帮忙,有点长,帮忙翻译一下
你说你不希望我因为你而影响现在的工作://zhidao,已经3点了!!丫头,我看见你的眼泪,可是小傻瓜,虽然信息发出去我就后悔了,反复再说一下,你是在乎我的!,无论我们将来是这样。好了,我保证以后不会了!,绝不去做,那件事!我也绝不让你去做的,我怕你真的不要我了.html" target="_blank">http!。丫头,丫头.baidu,只是不知道你什么时候才能看到它在你枕头下面啊~~丫头,听到你的哭声.com/question/。丫头,你永远记得,哪怕我们变成了仇人,即使,你答应我的,感谢上帝,今天陪客户的吃饭时候喝多了点://zhidao,对不起,对我来说,但是你那半个小时的眼泪将是我一生最珍惜的东西,第1次忘记给你电话了,无论什么时候,你是知道我为什么要这么做的.baidu,你就是全部,你又怎么知道,虽然我不想你流泪.com/question/.html丫头,我知道我是满足的,这封信我会请人翻译成英文的,还好,我真的好开心,看到你跑出门的那一刻,就不再写下去了,为了你我可以放弃一切,丫头第1部分 <a href="http
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don&#39;t like me and got angry with me, never to do that silly thing and i will not allow you to do it! I am sorry that i forgot to call you because you know it was because I got a little drunken when i had dinner with my client. My dear. I hope you will be happy forever! Ok.. My dear, I maybe look silly but i don&#39, you told me that you don&#39?, please remember, and you have promised to me! My darling.Hi my dear, although i didn&#39;t yout know whether i have done anything wrong: My dear?Do you know my hands were trembling so hard when i was t know when my letter will reach your pollow, my darling. You&#39. There are too many things that i&#39?! I was so sad. But This is the first time that i forgot to call you., I&#39! Forgive and believe me! Do you know how sorrowful i was when i wans standing at the crossingroad in front your house in the rain.Dve been telling me that my goodwill is an constant pressure to you请看纯正英文版本, it has been about 5 months since we got to know each other. But thank Gt sleep sincs really incurable. I
was afraid you would leave me alone! I was lucky to see that you were shedding tears which means you love me still, you may feel lonely when staying alone. I will have this letter translated into english.My darling!My dear girl.My dear,I suppose you must have gone to sleep at this moment: whatever happens to us and even if we were to become enemies,i know that you don&#39. The moment i heard your cry and the moment i saw the way you rush out the door I felt great sastifaction. I know that i might disturb and even upset you but I you know you are still a silly baby and you can not take care of yourself. I admit it and i will give time for consideration , yet you know your half-an-hour&#39!! i call you everyday just want to hear your voice, you know.. That will be such a happy thing. I am worrying about all your unhappiness and i don&#39;clock now and i wll end my letter! My darling.;s tears will be of the greatestt leave until 4 am, i have promised you that i will not go to see you., you may not safe when coming alonet want to see your tears: you might not eat on time. My dear girl?;t like my calling but don&#39;d likd like to repeat to you. You know why i will do this but you don&#39!, and this wt want to see your unhappiness:My dear girl. Do you know I was standing downstairs your house and didn&#39, I am happy because of your happiness. I have desperately fallen in love with you -- it&#39?, I am really very happy though I regretted having sent you my mail! How i want to hold your hads all the time and how i want to hug you. Bt you know that you are all my life and that i am ready to give up anything for you, do you know how upset i was that night when you told me that you don&#39. But i can&#39!第二部分;t want me to disturb your work!It is already 3 o&#39? Can you sense my heartache when i said to you i would no longer go to disturb you
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girl,i am really happy although i am regret after i sent the message , i afraid that you will leave me .But thank God ,i saw your tears and i knew that you still care about me .i heard the voice of crying and at the moment i saw you run off , i&#039;m glad that i am satisfied ,my girl ,although i don&#039;t want to see you cry ,but the tears for the half an hour will become the most cherish of my life .
my girl ,you said that you don&#039;t want me affect the work presently because of you ,but my silly girl ,how can&#039;t you know that ,for me you are everything ,i will give up everyhing just because of you .
ok ,my dear girl ,i drank too much caused ...
Girl, I really good fun, although the information sent to me a regret, I am afraid you do not really me, good, thank God, I saw your tears, I care about you, hear your cry , To see you run out of the moment, I know that I am satisfied, the girl, although I do not want you to tears, but tears for half an hour that you will cherish the most of my life.
Girl, you say you do not want to see me because you are now affected by the work of a small but a fool, you know how, for me, you are all, you have to give up everything I can.
Well, girl, to accompany clients to drink will leave more time for dinner, 1st forget to call you, I am sorry, I guarantee...
先占地 拿到第一篇分后给你写这个‘ 内裤里的南极’真不想说你。。
估计你要真有实力是能看出各个文章好坏,也不用找别人写了~所以第一篇我算是白费那么多心思了~~没时间给你翻第二篇了,顺便说一下,大致看看了其他人的,汗~~好多中式英语~~~楼主可要擦亮眼喽~~~
Girl , I are fond of feeling happy really , I have regretted that though the information effluence goes to , I am afraid that you have not needed me , passable , thanked God really , I see your tear , you are to care me about , hear your crying sound , that moment seeing you run out of the door, I know I am satisfied, girl , the thing cherishing most though I do not think that you burst into tears, but your half hours of tear will is my lifetime. Girl , you said you not hoping that I affect job now, but young fool because of you , how you know you are all to me , for you and I can abandon everything. The girl, accompanies customer&#039;s eating all right, t...
丫头,我真的好开心,虽然信息发出去我就后悔了,我怕你真的不要我了,还好,感谢上帝,我看见你的眼泪,你是在乎我的,听到你的哭声,看到你跑出门的那一刻,我知道我是满足的,丫头,虽然我不想你流泪,但是你那半个小时的眼泪将是我一生最珍惜的东西。
Girl, I really good fun, although the information sent to me a regret, I am afraid you do not really me, good, thank God, I saw your tears, I care about you, hear your cry , To see you run out of the moment, I know that I am satisfied, the girl, although I do not want you to tears, but tears for half an hour that you will cherish the most of my life.
丫头,你说你不希望我因为你而影响现在的工作,可是小傻瓜,你...
sweetie,i was really glad but the minute after i sent the message i regreted,i was scared that you didn&#039;t want me anymore,and thank God,i saw you cry,i heard you cry,you do care about me.i felt content when i saw you running out that door.i sure as hell don&#039;t wanna see you cry,but those tears you shed within the half hour are gonna be the most amazing things i&#039;ll always cherish in my heart.
sweetie,you said you didn&#039;t want me lack of concentration because of you,but you actually don&#039;t know what i can do for you,my pumpkin.you are everthing,i give my all just for you,did you know that?
well i&#039;m sorry that i didn&#039;t give you a call today for the very fi...
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出门在外也不愁Actually翻译_百度知道
Actually翻译
我给你打电话是想得到些建议。2)用于纠正他人或表示反对、居然, actually. 如果他要离开伯明翰。4)引入新话题,约翰,例如:I grew bored and actually fell asleep for a few minutes,例如:1)用于肯定一个事实, John。3)礼貌地表达与他人的期待所不同的观点. 这么说吧,我觉得有些无聊,还真的睡着了一小会儿: You use actually when you are correcting or contradicting someone, I rang you for some advice.
不,例如。实际上我是医生:Well actually,我不是学生. No, I&#39,说真的,例如;m not astudent,我会很惊讶. I&#39, if he left Bm a doctor.
一天下午, actually意思是实际上、事实上:I would be surprised。主要用法如下;竟然
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本帖最后由 Purple.Flame 于
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Love, ActuallyLauren Rolwing for The New York Times
I RECENTLY OVERHEARD two students talking in a dining hall at the university where I teach. “Yeah, I might get married, too,” one confided. “But not until I’m at least 30 and have a career.” Then she grinned. “Until then? I’m going to party it up.”
This young woman was practically following a script. An increasing number of studies show that many millennials want to marry — someday.
Generation Y is postponing marriage until, on average, age 29 for men and 27 for women. College-educated millennials in particular view it as a “capstone” to their lives rather than as a “cornerstone,” according to a report whose sponsors include the National Marriage Project at the University of Virginia.
Yet for all of their future designs on marriage, many of them may not get there. Their romance operandi — hooking up and hanging out — flouts the golden rule of what makes marriages and love work: emotional vulnerability.
“Staying vulnerable is a risk we have to take if we want to experience connection,” writes Brené Brown, a University of Houston researcher whose work focuses on the need for vulnerability and what happens when we desensitize ourselves to it.
Given the way members of Generation Y have been conditioned, their seemingly blithe attitude about marriage, perhaps even about love, may become less of a boon and more of a bust.
It’s no wonder, really, that many millennials are in this predicament, often at no fault of their own. Their lifelong associations with love are a familiar soundtrack: Since early childhood their ears have been subjected to thumping messages in the popular culture that sex confers social cachet and, more than anything else, belongs front and center in their identities. (Helloooo, Sex Week!)
Then there’s the familiar lyrics from their parents — rants about why grades, internships and anything else that makes their résumés appear more extraordinary trump romantic relationships. And the constant bass line of social media, which, let’s face it, trivializes the complexity of romantic relationships. (One study out of the University of Missouri found that people in romantic relationships of three years or less who use Facebook more than once an hour are more likely to experience relational corrosion, including infidelity.)
But wait a minute. Don’t we naturally become more emotionally mature by the time we’re ready to settle down in our 30s? Not as much anymore. Research led by the social psychologist Sara H. Konrath at the University of Michigan has shown that college students’ self-described levels of empathy have declined since 1980, especially so in the past 10 years, as quantifiable levels of self-esteem and narcissism have skyrocketed. Add to this the hypercompetitive reflex that hooking up triggers (the peer pressure to take part in the hookup culture and then to be first to unhook) and the noncommittal mind-set that hanging out breeds. The result is a generation that’s terrified of and clueless about the A B C’s of romantic intimacy.
In “The End of Sex: How Hookup Culture Is Leaving a Generation Unhappy, Sexually Unfulfilled, and Confused About Intimacy,” Donna Freitas chronicles the ways in which this trend is creating the first generation in history that has no idea how to court a potential partner, let alone find the language to do so.
If this fear of vulnerability began and ended with mere bumbling attempts at courtship, then all of this might seem harmless, charming even. But so much more is at stake.
During class discussions, my students often admit to hoping that relationships will simply unfold through hooking up. “After all,” one student recently said, “nobody wants to have The Talk,” the dreaded confrontation that clarifies romantic hopes and expectations. “You come off as too needy.”
This fear sets up the dicey precedent Dr. Brown warns us about: Dodging vulnerability cheats us of the chance to not just create intimacy but also to make relationships work.
Then there’s the emotional fallout of hooking up. This kind of sexual intimacy inevitably leads to becoming “emotionally empty,” writes Dr. Freitas. “In gearing themselves up for sex, they must at the same time drain themselves of feeling.”
This dynamic is about more than simply quelling nerves with “liquid courage” at college parties or clubs. It’s about swallowing back emotions that are perceived as annoying obstacles. And this can start a dangerous cycle.
“We cannot selectively numb emotions,” writes Dr. Brown. “When we numb the painful emotions, we also numb the positive emotions.”
We further desensitize ourselves to love when we stifle the bonding feelings that spring forth from oxytocin. This “love” hormone is released during orgasm, but it also floods the body and brain after hugging or affectionate touching. Yet we deny such molecular reactions at great peril, according to Dr. Dean Ornish, founder of the nonprofit Preventive Medicine Research Institute and author of “Love and Survival: The Scientific Basis for the Healing Power of Intimacy.”
“I am not aware of any other factor in medicine that has a greater impact on our survival than the healing power of love and intimacy,” Dr. Ornish writes. “Not diet, not smoking, not exercise, not stress, not genetics, not drugs, not surgery.”
So, the question that has never needed asking before now looms large: How do we teach a generation how to love?
As many of my own students have professed, they aren’t exactly seeing their ideal of love modeled at home or among friends.
Some campus counseling centers have picked up on this curiosity and frustration, offering workshops on related topics, such as the one at the University of Kentucky on healthy dating or at Duke University on “How to Be in Love.” Duke’s original series featured four sessions, including surviving breakups, recognizing toxic romance and discerning between love and infatuation. A spinoff seminar will focus on relationship issues for women of color.
The time has arrived for such programs, says Theresa Benson, assistant director of the counseling center at the University of Illinois, Urbana-Champaign. Dr. Benson oversees a staff of 20 undergraduates who develop and lead the workshops. One, “College Dating: Uncovering the Dating Scene,” helps students learn essentials like how to ask someone out, what to do on a date and the many faces of relationships, including polyamory.
When Dr. Benson says that “students may not be learning the interpersonal skills to communicate face to face,” she may be couching this trend a bit too tentatively. That there is even a need for these workshops speaks volumes: The most elemental skills of romantic intimacy are going the way of cursive handwriting.
Perhaps this is where college classrooms can step in. For this résumé-driven generation, schools would do well to add a grade-based seminar about love. The course could cross many academic disciplines: the the multicultural
the psychology and sociology of vulnerability.
Such a proposal may sound far-fetched. But this is an opportunity for colleges to walk the talk of their marketing messages, which tout developing not just the minds of students but the whole person. It’s time for students to feel the love.
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Love, Actually教这一代人如何去爱
I RECENTLY OVERHEARD two students talking in a dining hall at the university where I teach. “Yeah, I might get married, too,” one confided. “But not until I’m at least 30 and have a career.” Then she grinned. “Until then? I’m going to party it up.”
最近在我任教的那所大学的餐厅吃饭时,我无意中听到两位学生谈心。“是啊,我也可能会结婚的,”其中一位吐露心声。“但至少要等到30岁,我事业有成的时候。”她随后咧嘴一笑。“在那之前?我还没玩够呢。”
This young woman was practically following a script. An increasing number of studies show that many millennials want to marry — someday.
这个女孩其实是在遵循一个脚本。越来越多的研究表明,许多千禧一代都想结婚——终有一天。
Generation Y is postponing marriage until, on average, age 29 for men and 27 for women. College-educated millennials in particular view it as a “capstone” to their lives rather than as a “cornerstone,” according to a report whose sponsors include the National Marriage Project at the University of Virginia.
包括弗吉尼亚大学(University of Virginia)国家婚姻项目(National Marriage Project)在内的几家机构发起的一项研究显示,平均来说,千禧一代正在推迟婚龄至29岁(男性)和27岁(女性)。许多人,尤其是受过大学教育的千禧一代,把婚姻视为人生的“顶峰”,而不是“基石”。
Yet for all of their future designs on marriage, many of them may not get there. Their romance operandi — hooking up and hanging out — flouts the golden rule of what makes marriages and love work: emotional vulnerability.
然而,尽管他们对未来的婚姻做了种种设计,但其中许多人或许无法实现自己的结婚梦。他们的恋爱方式——先勾搭,再厮混——完全无视促成美满婚姻和幸福爱情的金科玉律:情感的脆弱性。
“Staying vulnerable is a risk we have to take if we want to experience connection,” writes Brené Brown, a University of Houston researcher whose work focuses on the need for vulnerability and what happens when we desensitize ourselves to it.
“如果我们想体验亲密关系,保持脆弱就是我们不得不承受的一个风险,”休斯顿大学(University of Houston)教授布林·布朗(Brené Brown)写道。布朗女士一直致力于研究脆弱的必要性,以及对脆弱失去敏感会导致什么后果等问题。
Given the way members of Generation Y have been conditioned, their seemingly blithe attitude about marriage, perhaps even about love, may become less of a boon and more of a bust.
鉴于千禧一代的成长环境,他们对婚姻(甚或对爱情)看似乐观的态度或许不是福音,而是不祥之兆。
It’s no wonder, really, that many millennials are in this predicament, often at no fault of their own. Their lifelong associations with love are a familiar soundtrack: Since early childhood their ears have been subjected to thumping messages in the popular culture that sex confers social cachet and, more than anything else, belongs front and center in their identities. (Helloooo, Sex Week!)
难怪许多千禧一代陷入这种困境,但这往往并非他们自己的过错。他们与爱情的终生联系是一支多么熟悉的配乐:从小时候起,这代人的耳朵就一直在经受流行文化的冲击,其蕴含的讯息是,性爱赋予社会威望,并且比其他任何东西都更为显著地居于一个人身份特性的中心位置。(你好,性爱周!)
Then there’s the familiar lyrics from their parents — rants about why grades, internships and anything else that makes their résumés appear more extraordinary trump romantic relationships. And the constant bass line of social media, which, let’s face it, trivializes the complexity of romantic relationships. (One study out of the University of Missouri found that people in romantic relationships of three years or less who use Facebook more than once an hour are more likely to experience relational corrosion, including infidelity.)
然后是来自他们父母的再熟悉不过的歌词——父母动不动就怒发冲冠地向他们解释,为什么分数、实习经历,以及其他任何能够让简历看起来非比寻常的东西都要比恋爱关系重要得多。此外就是社交媒体构成的低音线,让我们直面一个事实:社交媒体简化了恋爱关系的复杂性。(密苏里大学的一项研究发现,在恋爱关系持续了3年或更少时间的人群中,每小时使用Facebook超过一次的人的恋情更容易受到侵蚀,包括不忠)。
But wait a minute. Don’t we naturally become more emotionally mature by the time we’re ready to settle down in our 30s? Not as much anymore. Research led by the social psychologist Sara H. Konrath at the University of Michigan has shown that college students’ self-described levels of empathy have declined since 1980, especially so in the past 10 years, as quantifiable levels of self-esteem and narcissism have skyrocketed. Add to this the hypercompetitive reflex that hooking up triggers (the peer pressure to take part in the hookup culture and then to be first to unhook) and the noncommittal mind-set that hanging out breeds. The result is a generation that’s terrified of and clueless about the A B C’s of romantic intimacy.
且慢。难道等到30来岁,当一切都安定下来的时候,我们的情绪不是自然会变得更加成熟吗?不再是这样。密歇根大学(University of Michigan)社会心理学家萨拉·康拉特( Sara H. Konrath)主持的研究发现,自1980年以来,特别是过去10年,大学生自我描述的同感水平一直在下降,自尊和自恋的可量化水平则持续飙升。再加上勾搭行为激发的高度竞争反射(来自同伴的参加勾搭文化然后第一个分手的压力),以及外出疯玩孕育的不置可否的思维定式。其结果就是这一代人对恋爱关系惊恐万分,对爱情的基础知识一无所知。
In “The End of Sex: How Hookup Culture Is Leaving a Generation Unhappy, Sexually Unfulfilled, and Confused About Intimacy,” Donna Freitas chronicles the ways in which this trend is creating the first generation in history that has no idea how to court a potential partner, let alone find the language to do so.
在《性爱的终结:勾搭文化如何导致一代人不幸福,无法获得性满足,对性关系感到困惑》(The End of Sex: How Hookup Culture Is Leaving a Generation Unhappy, Sexually Unfulfilled, and Confused About Intimacy)一书中,唐娜·弗雷塔斯(Donna Freitas)详尽阐述了这种趋势如何导致历史上首次出现了这样一代人:他们不知道如何追求一位潜在伴侣,更遑论找到这样做的语言了。
If this fear of vulnerability began and ended with mere bumbling attempts at courtship, then all of this might seem harmless, charming even. But so much more is at stake.
如果这种对脆弱的恐惧仅仅是以笨拙的求爱开始和结束,那么这一切似乎没有什么害处,甚至还有些迷人。但它的利害关系其实要重大得多。
During class discussions, my students often admit to hoping that relationships will simply unfold through hooking up. “After all,” one student recently said, “nobody wants to have The Talk,” the dreaded confrontation that clarifies romantic hopes and expectations. “You come off as too needy.”
在课堂讨论中,我的学生经常坦言,他们希望恋爱关系在勾搭的过程中自然而然地展现出来。“毕竟,”一位学生最近说。“没有人想正儿八经地谈论这种事,”也就是那种想起来就可怕,阐明恋爱希望和期待的交谈。“这样做让你看起来特别渴望爱情的滋润。”
This fear sets up the dicey precedent Dr. Brown warns us about: Dodging vulnerability cheats us of the chance to not just create intimacy but also to make relationships work.
这种恐惧会引发布朗博士警示我们注意的那种危险先例:逃避脆弱会使我们丧失建立恋爱关系,以及让这种关系结成正果的机会。
Then there’s the emotional fallout of hooking up. This kind of sexual intimacy inevitably leads to becoming “emotionally empty,” writes Dr. Freitas. “In gearing themselves up for sex, they must at the same time drain themselves of feeling.”
此外,勾搭行为还会对情绪带来负面影响。这种性亲密必然导致“情感空虚,”弗雷塔斯博士写道。“在准备性爱的过程中,他们肯定在同一时间耗尽了自己的感受。”
This dynamic is about more than simply quelling nerves with “liquid courage” at college parties or clubs. It’s about swallowing back emotions that are perceived as annoying obstacles. And this can start a dangerous cycle.
这种动态不仅仅是指在大学聚会或俱乐部上用“喝了几杯酒激发起的勇气”去平息神经。它还指压制那些被视为障碍的情绪。这可能会开启一个危险的循环。
“We cannot selectively numb emotions,” writes Dr. Brown. “When we numb the painful emotions, we also numb the positive emotions.”
“我们不能选择性地麻木情绪,”布朗博士写道,“当我们麻木痛苦的情绪时,我们也麻木了积极的情绪。 ”
We further desensitize ourselves to love when we stifle the bonding feelings that spring forth from oxytocin. This “love” hormone is released during orgasm, but it also floods the body and brain after hugging or affectionate touching. Yet we deny such molecular reactions at great peril, according to Dr. Dean Ornish, founder of the nonprofit Preventive Medicine Research Institute and author of “Love and Survival: The Scientific Basis for the Healing Power of Intimacy.”
当我们扼杀经由催产素产生的亲密情感时,我们也就进一步降低了我们自己对爱情的敏感度。这种“爱情”荷尔蒙是在性高潮时被释放出来的,但它也会在拥抱或深情缠绵后涌入身体和大脑。然而,迪恩·欧宁胥(Dean Ornish)博士认为,如果我们拒绝这种分子反应,我们将承受巨大的危险。欧宁胥是非营利组织预防医学研究院(Preventive Medicine Research Institute)创始人,著有《爱情与生存:亲密关系具有治愈能力的科学依据》(Love and Survival: The Scientific Basis for the Healing Power of Intimacy)一书。
“I am not aware of any other factor in medicine that has a greater impact on our survival than the healing power of love and intimacy,” Dr. Ornish writes. “Not diet, not smoking, not exercise, not stress, not genetics, not drugs, not surgery.”
“就对我们的生存产生的影响而言,我不知道医学上还有什么其他因素能够胜过爱情和亲密关系的治愈功能,”欧宁胥博士写道。“饮食、吸烟、运动、紧张、遗传、药品和手术等因素都比不上。”
So, the question that has never needed asking before now looms large: How do we teach a generation how to love?
所以,现在赫然耸现出一个以前根本不需要问的问题:我们应该怎么教这一代人如何去爱?
As many of my own students have professed, they aren’t exactly seeing their ideal of love modeled at home or among friends. Some campus counseling centers have picked up on this curiosity and frustration, offering workshops on related topics, such as the one at the University of Kentucky on healthy dating or at Duke University on “How to Be in Love.” Duke’s original series featured four sessions, including surviving breakups, recognizing toxic romance and discerning between love and infatuation. A spinoff seminar will focus on relationship issues for women of color.
正如我自己的许多学生声称的那样,他们并没有在家里或朋友间看到完美爱情的样板。一些校园咨询中心已经注意到这种好奇心和挫折感,并且举办了一些相关话题讲座,比如肯塔基大学(University of Kentucky)以健康的约会方式为主题举办了一场讲座,还有杜克大学(Duke University)的“如何恋爱”讲座。杜克大学原创的系列讲座共四个会场,其主题包括如何度过分手后的困难时期,如何确认有毒的浪漫关系,如何区分爱情和迷恋。一个衍生的研讨会将关注有色人种妇女的恋爱问题。
The time has arrived for such programs, says Theresa Benson, assistant director of the counseling center at the University of Illinois, Urbana-Champaign. Dr. Benson oversees a staff of 20 undergraduates who develop and lead the workshops. One, “College Dating: Uncovering the Dating Scene,” helps students learn essentials like how to ask someone out, what to do on a date and the many faces of relationships, including polyamory.
伊利诺伊大学厄巴纳-香槟分校(University of Illinois, Urbana-Champaign)心理咨询中心助理主任特里萨·本森(Theresa Benson)声称,开展这些项目的时机已经成熟。本森博士带领20位本科生开发和组织数个专题研讨会。其中一个名为“大学约会:揭开约会场景”的研讨会致力于帮助学生掌握一些基本的恋爱技能,比如如何邀请异性外出,约会时应做些什么,并且让他们知道恋爱关系有其多面性,比如“劈腿”的问题。
When Dr. Benson says that “students may not be learning the interpersonal skills to communicate face to face,” she may be couching this trend a bit too tentatively. That there is even a need for these workshops speaks volumes: The most elemental skills of romantic intimacy are going the way of cursive handwriting.
本森博士说,“学生或许没有学习过人际交往技巧,他们不会进行面对面沟通。”这番话或许是在试探性地表述这种趋势。学生甚至需要这些研讨会这一事实本身就很能说明问题:学生们得像学写字母连体一样,从零开始学习最基本的恋爱技能。
Perhaps this is where college classrooms can step in. For this résumé-driven generation, schools would do well to add a grade-based seminar about love. The course could cross many academic disciplines: the the multicultural
the psychology and sociology of vulnerability.
也许这就是大学课堂可以介入的地方。鉴于这代学生凡事以简历为动力,学校最好增加一个以爱情为主题,并且计入学分的研讨会。这门课程可以跨越多个学科:性关系生物学,求爱的多文化历史,脆弱心理学和社会学。
Such a proposal may sound far-fetched. But this is an opportunity for colleges to walk the talk of their marketing messages, which tout developing not just the minds of students but the whole person. It’s time for students to feel the love.
这样的建议听起来非常牵强。但对于高等院校来说,这是一个践行其对外宣称的办学宗旨的机会——许多高校在招生时声称,他们不仅仅致力于培养学生的头脑,还会帮助学生塑造完整的人格。现在是时候让学生品尝爱情的滋味了。
哦哦哦哦哦哦哦哦哦
Love, Actually教这一代人如何去爱
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